Supporting a survivor of discrimination or hate can be daunting especially when it is someone close to you and you are worried about saying or doing "the wrong thing." You don't have to be an expert to support someone but there are some really simple things you can do that will help.
Listen and Believe
- Listen. If someone discloses an experience of discrimination to you, listening to what they tell with no judgment, compassion and empathy can be incredibly helpful. Just taking the time to listen to someone and talk about what has happened can help.
- Believe. Rather than asking a lot of questions, just let them know that you believe them and will support them as best as you can. Try not to skip ahead to what to do practically without first validating what you have heard and listening to what they have to say.
- Reassure. Remind them that no one, regardless of relationship or status, has the right to hurt them and that no matter what, it is not their fault that this occurred.
- Give Options. You can simply ask them what they need or want. They might not make the same decision you would; however, only they can decide what is best for them. You can help them explore options but avoid telling them what they should do.
Signpost to University Support
There is lots of specialist support available within the University that your friend or loved one can access for support.
- Student Life Adviser. An adviser can talk through the University's procedures, how to make a complaint and what support is available, in confidence.
- Residential Life Team. Whether it is your neighbourhood Student Services Resident (SSR) or the Duty SSR, if you are living in UEA residences there is someone to talk to.
- The uea(su) Advice Service is a free, confidential service. Advisers can support students who have been named in a disciplinary report for breach of the General Regulations for Students, and can talk through the procedure, what options are available and help you complain if you are unhappy with the process.
- Your School. If you are a student you can talk to your academic adviser.
Signpost to Specialist Services
- Citizens Advice provides some information on bullying, harassment and hate crime people may experience.
- Family Lives provides some information and advice on bullying at University
- The National Union of Students (NUS) has put together some top tips on how to deal with bullying in halls.
- Young Minds has put together a blog on how to deal with bullying at University
- True Vision offers guidance on reporting hate crime and hate incidents. If you do not wish to talk to anyone in person about the incident or wish to remain anonymous, there is an online form for reporting hate crime; you can report non-crime hate incidents to the police to try and prevent any escalation in seriousness.
- Disability Equality NW runs the Developing from the Negatives Project (DFN), which aims to raise awareness of Disability Hate Crime and encourage reporting.
- Tell MAMA supports victims of anti-Muslim hate and is a public service which also measures and monitors anti-Muslim incidents.
- Community Security Trust (CS) helps those who are victims of anti-Semitic hatred, harassment or bias.
- Stop Hate UK provides independent, confidential and accessible reporting and support for victims, witnesses and third parties.
- Stop Hate in Norfolk (SHiN) is a a resource for everyone who wants to work towards tackling Hate in Norfolk.
- Victim Support. If you report a crime to the police, they should automatically ask you if you would like help from an organisation like Victim Support. But anyone affected by crime can contact them directly – you don’t need to talk to the police to get Victim Support help.
Reporting Options
It's important to respect any reporting decision including a decision not to report at all. There are a lot of reasons why someone may choose not to report, only they can decide what is best for them.
- Police Some forms of harassment might also break criminal law, in which case you can report to police. In an emergency or if you are in immediate danger you should dial 999. Otherwise, you can call 101, report online or visit your local police station to report a crime. Reporting is a big decision and all of the support services linked to above can support you with this, if your friend or loved one decides to make a police report.
- University. If the perpetrator is a member of the University community, your friend or loved one will have the option of submitting a formal report. The first step to making a formal report is to speak with an advisor, who will be able to provide your friend or loved one with advice and support on what options are available to make an informed decision.